From a very young age, people around you give you some form of expectation. Whether or not by age 2, you can read Peter and Jane book 5 independently. Are you able to ride a bike without training wheels? Do you cry while taking vaccination shots?

As you age, you start giving yourselves the same expectations, just in different context. You seem to think that happiness is a destination.. And like a board game, you map out your strategies, plan your ambushes; say the Hail Mary and roll the dice.

You think that you will be happier if you lost a good 10 pounds, or clerk an interesting case in the ward without any interruptions within the time limitation you set for yourself, or finally get that Tiffany & Co. that you've been longing for. We equate our sense of satisfaction from things that we can see or hold or touch or document.

I read an interesting short story by Neil Gaiman some time ago,

‘You can take your gold, but afterwards, things are,’ he paused, ‘things are flat. There is less beauty in a rainbow, less meaning in a sermon, less joy in a kiss…’ He looked at the cave mouth and I thought I saw fear in his eyes. ‘Less’

I said, ‘ There are many for whom the lure of gold outweighs the beauty of a rainbow.’

At one point, when we’ve achieved all that we’ve set out to achieve. We’ll find that we’re still stuck in a perpetual hangover. Wondering where all the meaning has gone; and no matter how much horse shit you put on your lawn, why the hell is the grass still greener on the other side.

Being human, we cling too dearly to things that we should let go of. Whether they are unrealistic expectations of the future, the past that we cannot change, or the present that we are unwilling to accept.


And in the end, that is what drives us mad.