intrepide;

⎡Grief is like the ocean; it comes in waves, ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.⎦

⎯ Vicki Harrison

time: 0246

mood: extremely fatigue but can't sleep  .___.

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Currently posted in Paediatrics.

Everyday I leave the ward heavy hearted because it is when I see them at their weakest I realise how little I can actually do to make these poor kids feel better. But it is also when I see them being so helpless, I feel even more the urge to help. I need to do something to ease their pain.

Someone I met recently told me he felt the same way when he was still a student but after he started working that fire in him somehow dies off. He told me everything changes as you start working, but I choose to believe that it's human nature to feel the need to help; and that the passion in him to help and save lives is just transiently masked by stress and workload.

I'm writing this down today so that if the me in the future ever feel that way too when I start working, please remind yourself of how you felt when you see these children today as a student, and make that a form of motivation that helps you power through all the difficulties of said tough houseman-ship. Nobody said it was easy. In fact, everybody told you it is going to be a rough journey so be prepared.

Don't let them take you down.

Here's my latest snaps update. My friends and I survived a back-to-back night call + whole day weekend call duty. Lucky for us that the hospital is just across the road from our accommodation, we get to go back (or out) for lunch & dinner break and I managed to sneak in BBG W11 abs workout (which I proudly included in my snap but snapchat bug doesn't allow it to be shown here :/) in between. By the end of the whole on call duty, we were all exhausted but happy and proud that we made it!